Money & Me

With regard to the article Who Pays? I figure I have an idea of my own about who pays. I have this principle that if I can't afford to pay for my meal, and his, I'll try not to go out at all. I wish that guys had the decency to do the same.

I've experienced going out with guys who insist that they pay for everything. Sometimes, I go out with guys who insist on paying but are okay if we split the bill, not half half, but as much as we are financially able to handle. Sometimes on a date, I pay. Sometimes the guys says he'll pay, but seems in some way reluctant, and in the end I insist on paying.

I think that paying for a meal is a very sensitive issue on a date. On one hand it's great to have someone pay, on the other, it makes me get this weird feeling. Personally I like to pay, but I feel sometimes that I shouldn't because it affects the guy's ego. Usually I opt to pay.

It's ironic that paying should be such a sensitive issue for me, because I strongly believe that money should never be an influencing factor in a relationship, it's shallow, and unethical. I think this is a phobia that I have, and it does affect me to a certain degree.

Imagine going out on a date, seeing the person you really want to see, but you're flat broke. For me, I would rather stay at home than to go out and feel unsafe. I think for me to have enough cash on me is essential, mainly for safety and security.Not all guys I go out with are filthy rich, even if they happen to be, we all have times in our lives where, we're just not that financially stable. I shudder to the day where I'll be stuck in a resturant because I didn't bring any cash, and he doesn't have any either.

Actually, it doesn't really matter to me who pays. What matters to me is that the guy understands that I, like him, will at some point in time, have a financial crisis. I think it's essential to understand that, and try not to make a big deal over how much you he paid, or how much you paid, and how often.

I think the most important about money and relationship is to know that your man doesn't mind paying for you, just as you don't mind paying for him.